Things that make me happy right now

Today on my way home from work I started to listen to the audio reading of Oprah Winfrey’s book What I Know For Sure, which is a collection of life lessons she has learned over the past years. In the first chapter she talks about how she has learned to appreciate smaller things like a delicious, warm cup of tea in the afternoon or having dinner with a friend.

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That got me thinking about how I should start appreciating things more, and be thankful for everyday I get to live. So that’s what I thought I should do right now!

Here are the things I could think of that I am happy about right now:

  • That I’m making progress in my driving, and will soon be able to get my driving license, whch will make it possible for me to drive down Highway 1 in California next summer.

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  • The lovely sushi dinner on the floor last night in my friend’s new apartment.Screenshot 2015-11-02 at 16.49.41
  • That I’m starting to get excited about studying at university and am thinking that starting next fall will be the right choice for me, and that I will have a lot of fun.

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  • When my boyfriend called me today at work to talk about our trip to the US next summer, and how we will be able to meet up his amazing family in Florida for a week which will make the trip even better.

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  • That I’m going to my boyfriend’s floorball game tonight, which is always fun. And also I will get to meet his sister whom I adore. And also I will get to fall asleep in his arms tonight.

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  • That my mom is making macaroni casserole right now which will be delicious! (A Finnish dish which is AMAZING!) And also my sister and her boyfriend is coming over for dinner which is always a pleasure!

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  • That since I started to go to the gym regularly again, as well as eating a lot of vitamins, I don’t crave sugar and alcohol anymore. I also feel more energized and happy, and I don’t have as much stomach ache.

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Life is pretty great 🙂

What are you happy about today?

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How to make choices in life

When I was younger I had a tendency to get an anxiety attack from decision-making. I was so afraid of regrets I couldn’t make any decisions or take any chances, only because of the fear of realizing afterwards I hade made the wrong choice. 

It got so extreme, I couldn’t even choose which pizza to order without feeling anxious. However, now when I’m older, and have pushed myself and worked hard to overcome this fear, I’m almost an expert in making decisions, without any anxiety. And it’s super easy as well!

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Today I can easily decide whether to take a job opportunity or not, if I should move somewhere, what to study at university and if I should break up with someone. With easily I don’t mean fast. Sometimes the choice takes a very long time to make. But I don’t feel stressed about it, and I don’t rush it. Big life decisions don’t have to be decided in twenty minutes. It can take a year if it needs to.

The key is that deep down you already know the right choice. But the right choice is often covered with doubts, others’ opinions, other tempting options and fear of making the wrong choice.

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The steps of decision-making:

  • Think through which option that would actually be good for you, and which options that just sound good. Fine, journalist or scientist might seem like really cool jobs. And being single can be fun. And moving to Australia might be an adventure. But is it actually what you want, or just something you imagine you want because people speak fondly about it? There’s a lot of things that we are “supposed to do at our age” according to social norms. Really think about what you want, and what you’re only supposed to want.
  • Think through what it realistically will be like. This was always my biggest issue, because I used to romanticize everything, and then get disappointed when things never lived up to my expectations. Yes, moving to Australia is going to be beach parties, palm trees, surfing and sunshine. But moving abroad will also be lonely, culture crashes, difficulties to find jobs, problems with visa, difficulties to find apartments etcetera. Really try to imagine all the negative things that will occur as well, and decide if it’s worth it.
  • Listen to your gut instinct. Your gut instinct is your most important guide in life. It has already made the choice for you. The reason your gut instinct is so important is because we all want to be happy and satisfied in life. If your gut is not happy, you will constantly live with this weird feeling in your gut that tells you something is wrong and there is something to worry about. And that’s not a pleasant feeling. A happy gut is a happy person 🙂

There are all my tips I could think of right now. Hope they were helpful 🙂

Have a lovely Saturday everyone!

Let’s talk about balance in life

The other day I met up with a friend who’s studying politics at one of the best universities in Sweden. She mentioned how stressful it is, and how some people in her class stay up for 80 hours straight just to have the time to have the best grades, manage a job, represent a student group etcetera.

Recently I also met this girl who said she used to go to the gym every single day and never left before she had burned 1000 calories, no matter how exhausted she was.

I also recently discussed careers with my boyfriend since he’s considering becoming a lawyer but don’t know if he’ll manage working 60 hour weeks (that’s what’s expected from newly graduated lawyers).

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All of this made me think about how easily people give up happiness and health in their life. If you ask anyone what their goal in life is, they would most likely answer “to be happy, of course”. We all just want to be happy. But at the same time we prioritize success, good looks and money above happiness and good health.

Obviously I too think that you need to work hard in life. You have to have a few rough years in the beginning of your career. You have to force yourself to the gym sometimes when you’re getting a bit too lazy. But there has to be a balance. 

Life is not that long. So even though it is great to be thinking about the future and laying the groundwork for a happy life, there is a present to consider as well.


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How you feel right now matters. If you have slept enough this week matter. Your stress level right now matters. 

Life is what’s happening right now. Today. If you’re always thinking about your future, ask yourself when you will reach that day that your future will become the present. If not now, when will you start prioritizing your happiness? If not now, when will you reach the point when you’re satisfied with your life? 

Goal oriented people can easily go an entire life without ever landing in their present and appreciate what they have accomplished and all the good things they have in their life. But that’s not what life is about, right?

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Three blog awards

During the last few weeks I’ve had the honour of being nominated three times to different blog awards! That’s crazy and so much fun! Thank you!

I thought I’d walk through them one by one. There are two Liebster Awards and one One Lovely Blog Award. If you want to check out the last time I did a Liebster Award click here.

I nominate all of my readers to all of the awards, and would love if you would answer the questions with me. It’s always fun getting to know people deeper 🙂

Well, here we go!


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The first one is a Liebster Award from Getting Through Anxiety

And here are the questions I was being asked:

1.) Who is your least favorite famous person? Why?

Hitler. I know his dead, but he’s still famous and adored by some people, which is just insane and sad. How people in our modern society still have racist views I will never understand.

2.) What is your favorite guilty pleasure TV show or movie?

The movie Legally Blonde with Reese Witherspoon. It’s quite a cheesy movie but it makes me so happy and feel empowered as a woman.

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3.) What do you like better? Watching TV or reading?

I wish I could say reading but I really love watching TV. I don’t think I could live without Friends, Modern Family and How I Met Your Mother.

4.) If you could date any character from any TV show or movie, who would it be?

I’ve always had a crush on Tom (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) from the movie (500) Days of Summer!

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5.) What’s your favorite store?

I love department stores, like Harrods in London. It’s just so glamorous and cozy!

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6.) Do you like silver or gold better?

Gold. More is more 🙂

7.) What do you enjoy best about writing?

How you find out things about yourself. When you write without thinking you can suddenly express something you didn’t even know you felt.

8.) If you had to choose, would you rather be a cat or a dog?

A dog! Dogs are generally treated better in our homes than cats (which is wrong because cats are lovely as well).


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The second one is The One Lovely Blog Award from Lusuna.

This award asks you to share 7 facts about yourself. Here are my seven facts:

  1. If I ever have a son I want him to be named Liam.
  2. I am very outgoing and often talk/share too much. But I really just love meeting people.
  3. Due to all of the people in my surroundings who have passed away lately I am terrified of death.
  4. I follow the news in almost an unhealthy way since the news are often horrible (war, death, racism, terrorism etc.) and makes me miserable. I spend hours each day listening to and reading the news.
  5. Me and my boyfriend are moving in together soon.
  6. I spend way too much money on perfume.
  7. I want to live in San Francisco some time in my life.

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The third one is the other Liebster Award from My Small Corner Isabelle.

And here are the questions I was being asked:

1.) Do you have any pets?

I do! I have a dog named Casper.

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2.) Favourite beauty product?

Concealer! Makes you look less tired, which is great for the Swedish winter where your are constantly looking like you’ve been awake for 16 days.

Fear?

Loneliness.

Favourite thing to do.

Watching Friends in my bed while eating chips and having a glass of red wine.

What do you imagine yourself doing in 20 years?

(Dream scenario): Having a house, two or three kids, being in love, having a job I like and that all my friends and family are in good health.

How long have you been blogging, and why you started.

I’ve been blogging for a few months now, and I started blogging to have a place to talk about anxiety, which is something I live with constantly and have to manage to have a “normal” life.

Favourite food and drink

A good steak and a glass of red wine.

How tall are you?

164 centimeters (don’t know in the other measurement systems haha).

What advice would you give your younger self?

Don’t be so hard on yourself. You have to be your own best friend, because having a war with yourself is destroying your life quality.

Name a random fact about yourself!

I was taken to lunch recently by a Swedish author and journalist I’ve been admiring for years (we worked together), which really made me realize that people are just people. No more, no less.


That was a lot of fun! Thank you so much for the nominations! Hope I did ok 🙂

I’m back! Sorry for being M.I.A

Hello all you lovelies!

I’m so sorry for the silence on the blog lately. I have been dealing with a lot of changes in my life lately which naturally have resulted in a lot of anxiety for me. Also I went to England and spent my days strolling around the little town of Canterbury and mentally sorting out my life.

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When I was strolling around in Canterbury

Anyways, I got a new job. Since last Tuesday I work for a governmental department, which feels good because it’s more meaningful than my last job. So that’s good! However, my boss looks very much alike my father who passed away in February which made me a bit stressed the first working days.

Also I have started going to the gym and talking a lot of walks to take care of my health. It is my new project for this winter so I don’t get so drained and exhausted during the cold and dark winter months.

I have also started to put some time and energy into getting my driving license. 

And tonight my boyfriend ans I are going out to dinner to celebrate 1,5 years together. 

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A breakfast last weekend

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Dinner with friends last night

That’s basically everything that’s going on in my life. As you see it’s quite a lot, but I will start to put more time into the blog now, because looking in now and seeing all the sweet comments you have written it really made me miss you guys! I really feel this is like a community of warmth and love 🙂 ❤

Lots of love,

Emma

A woman in a child’s body

This morning I had a job interview (surprise!) and the woman who interviewed me asked me for my birth date and when she found out I was only twenty she said; “Wait, what! Are you only twenty? I can see that you’re young but you seem like you’re almost thirty!” 

I answered; “I get that a lot, but in my mind I was born a thirty year old and every year when I grow older I feel like I become more and more like myself”. 

That what it’s been like my whole life. I know it might seem like I’m trying to brag about how mature I am, but really this has been an issue throughout my whole life, and it’s only now it has started to benefit me in life.

As a kid I was very awkward, and found it very difficult when my friends wanted to play. Playing seemed silly to me, and I didn’t know how I was supposed to act.

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When I was in middle school I spent more recess time indoors with the teachers than outside with the other children. I didn’t know how to communicate with other children and felt more comfortable around other adults.

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In high school I was left out for a long time because I couldn’t relate to other teens. I was uncomfortable with the jargon and didn’t know how to be fun and relaxed.

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My whole life has been a struggle to “act young” and trying to imitate the people in my age to try to fit in. That’s why growing older is the best thing I know. Today I have a lovely boyfriend and amazing friends, who all love me for the little adult in me. Who think I’m funny when I tell them I’ve been drinking coffee since the age of thirteen and has appreciated a good red wine since the age of eighteen. Who accepts that I fall asleep at 9 pm during weekends and watch documentaries for fun.

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Time. Time really does fix everything. 

Let’s talk about the hierarchy in workplaces and society

Now that I’m job hunting I have been to many workplaces – finance companies, governmental departments, telecom companies etcetera. During these interviews it occurred to me how silly the hierarchy in workplaces really is. At one interview they told me that “The people above you here are highly educated and are very important. They might ignore you or talk rudely to you, but you have to try to not care”. It annoyed me, because it occurred to me how everyone is just accepting that “important people” are allowed to treat the people “underneath them” badly.

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Another thing that I started thinking about regarding this is when I’ve been making hotel and restaurant reservations for my bosses at my current job. When the places are fully booked, people have been encouraging me to mention their (famous) names, and then the hotels and restaurants always magically have a room or table over for them. Then it occurred to be how many “full” restaurants we “unimportant people” can’t go to because they hold tables for “important” people.

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Why do we live in a society where we put a value on people? I understand that educated and rich people have more power due to the fact that our entire society is built on economic systems. But I do not understand why these people suddenly have the right to be treated better. They can have all the privileges they want, it doesn’t matter to me, but they do not have the right to not say Good Morning to the people “below” them.

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I admit that I used to be like that; “Of course she can ignore me – she’s famous”, or “Of course it’s ok that he didn’t say good morning to me – he’s the CEO”. Now, on the other hand, it upsets me. People sometimes ask me how I don’t get nervous around the powerful people I meet every day at work. And I tell them people don’t make me nervous anymore. People are people, no more no less.

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I have decided to never again look at someone a certain way due to their social status. And if I ever start a company or become CEO I will say Good Morning to every single person I meet before I sit down at my work desk.

Good morning Thursday!

Good morning everyone!

This morning I’m off work because I had a job interview earlier today. It went well, and now I’m in one of my favourite cafés, sitting at a corner table and writing a blog post about something I started reflecting on during these interviews. The post will probably come up later today.

By the way; now I only have one day left at my old job. Tomorrow I’ll hand in my keys, my card and my computer and it will all be over. It feels a bit sad, but I know it was the right choice. And on Monday I’m going to the UK! Can’t wait!!

How are you guys feeling today?

Love,

Emma

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Photos that inspire me

Sometimes when I feel the lack of motivation and graduate in my life, and don’t feel like I know who I am, who I want to be or where I’m going, I visit Tumblr.com for some inspiration. After 10 minutes I always feel energetic and happy again. Here are som photos that inspired me:

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Let’s talk about insecurities and imperfections

Yesterday I was invited to an old school friend’s birthday party. Many people from my old high school was there, some I hadn’t met since graduation. This friend held several house parties throughout high school so it became very obvious, now that we all were gathered again in that specific house, that we’re much more mature now than we were a few years ago.

What I love about getting older is that people don’t fear being imperfect anymore. A few years ago when we were gathered in that house there were a lot of social games being played. People were excluding, gossiping about and neglecting each other. People were describing their lives as perfect, bragging about their successes, and conversations were mostly about shallow things. Yesterday when we were gathered again, everyone greeted each other genuinely and listened to each others stories with great interest. Almost everyone opened up to people they rarely see about failing exams at university and their worries about having picked the wrong major. They talked about financial worries and boyfriend issues. And that made me so incredibly happy!

The reason this makes me so happy is because we are finally in that place in our lives where we can admit to others that our lives are not perfect, which is great because it leads to people being less hard on themselves because they know that everyone else also has issues, worries and anxiety. We stop being jealous of others and appreciate what we have, because we know that our lives are as great as everyone elses. (I have written about jealousy before, but it’s important to talk about because jealousy is very dangerous because it makes us unhappy and negative people.)

I told you a few days ago that my life is kind of messy and stressful right now. Had I been sixteen years old I would have left this party with even more anxiety than I had when I arrived. Yesterday I left the party feeling happy and satisfied with my life.

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And also, I met a puppy called Chanel last night so that kind of contributed to my happy mood 🙂